Feast 3 – movie review

Feast 3

Sometimes you get the funny feeling that you are being screwed with by a filmmaker. Sure, I mean, it isn’t that they always mean to screw with you but, dammit, they still do it. Case in point – Feast 3 – a film that neither needed nor really deserved a sequel, let alone two, yet, two we got, so instead of one, terribly fun, terribly fun stand alone film we got one really good movie and two needless add-ons that got worse and worse.

Which is not to say that Feast 3 is a bad film, it’s just a needless film, and one which I am needlessly reviewing.

Taking up exactly where the second film ended, Feast 3 takes the remaining cast members from the second installment and pits them once more against the bizarre and sexually deviant monsters that appeared in the first film and seek to either eat or screw anyone they can. The entire town that the cast has holed up in has become overrun by the monsters and if they have any hope of surviving, they need to find a way out of there, one way or another.

There isn’t much more to say about the plot than that. For a seventy-five minute movie there is an odd amount of plot devices here. It was like they had a lot of ideas but no real idea, or desire to fully investigate those ideas. Characters pop up only to die ironically and other characters die off just to kill off some of the main cast. Hell, I dunno if there is a likable character here, and with this many cast members, that’s saying something. The film is well made, is certainly gory, and has some shocks, but when it’s all said and done, to what end? The film’s ending is such a kick in the nuts after three films that you just want to scream. You can’t tell if they were just screwing with you for three movies, or really expect they will needlessly make a fourth film. You watch three films and learn little to nothing about the creatures and next to nothing about the characters. And it’s hard, as a fan of the first film, and even a passing fan of the second film, to get a movie like Feast 3 as your dessert. It is watchable, it is mildly entertaining, but to end a ‘trilogy’ with another useless gag, just because that’s your modus operandi is silly. What would have worked infinitely better is to do an Army of Darkness ending where save the characters from one boiling pot only to drop them into a bigger one.

This movie, this ending, will be perfect for some fans, and so be it. For me it felt like being kicked in the nuts and that isn’t a way to end a series. With such a strong first entry, it’s a shame that the films got progressively worse. This is definitely a case where I can safely tell you to watch the first film, and avoid the other two. Call me crazy.

5 out of 10

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